Rosie Sparkles
3 min readDec 13, 2020

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Unicorn Hunting Done Right: Why Couples Should Hire Sex Workers

There is a phenomenon on dating apps called the unicorn hunting, or heterosexual couples looking for a bisexual woman to join occasionally their bedroom and spice things up. There is absolutely nothing wrong with the fantasy but how it translates into real life is where ethical issues arise. You see, when a bisexual woman receives more propositions for spicing things up in a couple’s bedroom (usually with the woman being the spokesperson) than messages from singles really looking for an actual connection with them, it makes them feel more objectified than desired. For some bisexual women, this fantasy of joining a couple for one or two threesomes might also be interesting but for most of them, there is nothing less sexy than feeling use as a sex object instead of being seen and desire as the person they are. There are a lot of excellent essays from LGBTQ+ writers about how this is problematic. If this fantasy is that common and bisexual women are getting tired of being hunt like some kind of magical creature… why don’t these heterosexual couples hire sex workers?

The logical and most ethical way to fulfill the unicorn fantasy would be to hire an independent sex worker specialize in couples or women clients. As bisexual women hunted by couples often left the experience feeling used and unsatisfied, we can think of that they are doing a favor to the couple by entertaining them for an evening. Wouldn’t it be fair for them to ask for payment? Of course, not everyone should be a sex worker, as not everyone should accept any other work if it is not what they do. Not what their profession is. That’s just good old capitalism for you. Well, how it should work but that’s another story.

When a couple, as should any other kind of clientele, is looking to hire a sex worker, there are some things they should look for. First, they should stay away from review boards which are inhabited by guys looking to pay the less they can for sexual favors. You will not find adequate information about the services of independent sex workers. The second point is to look for an independent sex worker part of a collective if there is one in your city. If a sex worker is part of a collective, this means that other sex workers have met this person and that they are more than likely not under the influence of a pimp. They are also more likely to have a website and a social media platform on which you can read about their personality and the services they provide. Often, providers will state if they cater to couples on their websites. You can also assume sex workers who write that they see clients of all genders are also seeing couples. Third, you should contact the provider and suggest that the woman calls the sex worker to verify that she is on board with this adventure. Believe it or not, it often happens that a man will hire a sex worker for his couple without the wife knowing in advance. Consent from everyone should be the main focus and is the main ingredient for an awesome encounter.

While seeking a unicorn on a dating app can be a long, frustrating and disappointing experience for both the unicorn and the couple, hiring a sex worker is a straightforward and ethical way of fulfilling your fantasy if you do your research adequately. If the bisexual woman you had sex with could leave unsatisfied and feeling used, the sex worker will likely be very happy to join your couple and go home with her rent worth of money.

Have you ever hired a sex worker for your couple? If not, what is preventing you?

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Rosie Sparkles

Feminist sex worker based in Montreal. Writes about sex work, sexuality and related subjects.